lacking. lefts.

September 19, 2010

Dear Internet,

Is there a reason why I cannot make lefthand turns?

Heart (and sad face),


bacon. tree.

August 29, 2010

Two Mexicans are stuck in the desert after crossing into the United  States, wandering aimlessly and starving. They are about to just lie  down and wait for death, when all of a sudden Luis says………

“Hey Pepe, do you smell what I smell.   Ees bacon, I theenk.”

“Si, Luis, eet sure smells like bacon. ”

With renewed hope they struggle up the next sand dune, & there, in the distance, is a tree loaded with bacon.

There’s raw bacon, there’s fried bacon, back bacon, double smoked bacon … every imaginable kind of cured pork.

“Pepe, Pepe, we ees saved.   Ees a bacon tree.”

“Luis, maybe ees a meerage?   We ees in the desert don’t   forget.”

“Pepe, since when deed you ever hear of   a meerage that smell like bacon…ees no meerage, ees a bacon tree.”

And with that, Luis staggers towards the tree.   He gets to within 5  metres, Pepe crawling close behind, when suddenly a machine gun opens  up, and Luis drops like a wet sock.   Mortally wounded, he warns Pepe  with his dying breath,

“Pepe… go back man, you was right, ees not a bacon tree!”

“Luis, Luis mi amigo… what ees it? ”

“Pepe.. ees not a bacon tree.   Ees




Ees a ham bush….”

nonexistent. nation.

August 8, 2010

August already?? What’s even more shocking about the speed of time is the fact that it’s August and there is no air conditioning use occurring. This DEF doesn’t happen in the south. The lack of air conditioning temps can only mean one depressing thing: cold and dark days are ahead.

So, what has been so distracting from regular blog updates? Here’s a hint:

The Wall of Pain! It started off last fall looking decidely less crowded. Thanks to cycling, race frequency exploded exponentially (practically every weekend v. every month or so).

The Wall of Pain

I couldn’t even get the whole picture to fit. Here’s a further away attempt.

Massachusetts Criterium State Championships

This summer alone I’ve completed 18 road cycling races (the 19th and final road race will be on Wed). The only thing worse than complete burnout is the mental estimate of $$ spent on race dues. And that’s just the beginning, cyclocross season is right around the corner! And I wonder where my disposable income and free time goes.

I wish there was something more exciting to post about for the non-cycling audience, but really, you’ll just have to deal with it until I get a normal hobby. Of course, more frequent updates can be found on Twitter, Facebook, Facebook pt II and Foursquare.

chalk. chatter.

July 9, 2010

Le Tour. It’s French for The Tour. I’m totally multilingual, ya’ll.

Back for its second year, we’re not talking about retirement-spurned Lancelot, but the Nike Chalkbot! Graffiti the French countryside with a message that will forever last in history be around til it rains.

The only thing more exciting would be if a fight broke out and a cyclist used a wheel as a weapon. Wait..

Make your own Chalkbot message here.

music. mash.

June 22, 2010

This is probably one of the best representations of my musical taste.

The only thing that I can think of that could improve upon this mash up would be the inclusion of some Pat Green/Garth Brooks/Lonestar.

world. watching.

June 22, 2010

It’s that time again.. once every four years that those of us in the States pay attention to soccer football. What’s unfortunate is that stupid vuvuzela makes watching games like you have a ginormous hangover for the entire 90 min. If rugby was smart enough to ban them in South Africa, why can’t the football gods?

Even more importantly, what might inspire more Americans isn’t fancy footwork or actually winning (Slovenia? Really?) Why don’t we take a page from the Italians and their partnership with Dolce and Gabbana?

Okay, so I’m slightly biased because I’m part Italian, but seriously.. Count me in!

acute. alteration.

May 6, 2010

So, my non-collegiate spandex/team kit is brought to you by the clothing company Giordana. I’ve always liked this because 1) Giordana makes good stuff 2) it’s Italian and 3) it has the word ‘dana’ in the name. What isn’t there to like?

Naturally, I have one improvement.

I’m sure the folks at IBC won’t mind the slight modification.